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Sunset over Key West. We've finally completed the 2000 Sweaty Miles.

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The 5th flat of the day. But the fun wasn't over. The pedestrian bridge cuts off half way across the ocean. But there's no sign to tell you that. And why would there be? Who uses a bridge to get to the other side?

So good we had to write about it twice.

"GET IN BUDDY OR WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!" screamed the cabby screetching to
a halt in front of me as I walked across 7 mile bridge.

Today was not a good day. After a brutally hot evening in the tent, we
woke to get an early start. Breakfast was good, finding a replacement
for Charles' shredded tire, courtesy the rt 1 cats eyes, was not. We
found one at a flea market bike shop run out of a uhaul storage unit.
The absurdity of the range of goods here would define the day. Having
saddled up we rode off into the now midday sun, awesome. The ride was
pretty but the road was unforgiving, a fact Charles learned as I
waited 45minutes for a necessary flat change. Fortuately we had
dolphins waiting for us 30 miles down the road, it was 1.30, no
trouble right?

False

A rear flat slowed my progress, and Charles needed more air, I arrived
at the dolphins at 4pm, they close at 4:30, of course. No dolphins
allowed, there was iguana road kill though, nice change from armadillo.

Before we could leave, Charles got a flat tire, requiring my second
tube and air canister. Flat fixed we rolled on, only to discover the
piece of metal pulled from the tire was simply a decoy for the shard
of glass that was really responsible, sneaky.

Finally, we hit the marathon bridge, which had a very nice looking
bike path on the adjacent disused rail bridge. Enter 3" vertical
concrete flake and a jarring flat. The patch kit did not suffice.

Enter the daredevil cabby, called by the sheriffs department.

The only bike shop on big pine key, or the next 20 miles, is closed
tomorrow. Icarus flew too close to the sun and got burned, it seems we
may have come too close to key west.

Sent from my iPhone

Big Pine Key

"Get in the car fast or we're all gonna die!" yelled the cabby. Ed obliged. He had spent two of the seven miles of the Seven Mile Bridge walking his bike, and as the sun set over the Atlantic, the alternative - continuing to walk a bridge out of a place called Marathon - was less appealing.

Before today, we had six flat tires. We nearly tied that mark today, tallying five, including two by Charlie within five minutes of each other; we await the Guiness Book response. The day also saw the following let downs: shredded tire (Charlie), arrival at Dolphin Research Center fifteen minutes too late, and plans to snorkle, the air from which slowly hissed out with each piece of shard metal sucked in like a vacuum by our tires.

Still, there were positives: watching iquanas scamper away from our bikes, watching Ed eat a fountain-sized bowl of beef stroganof, and the prospect of snorkeling tomorrow morning before we finish the final 30 miles to Key West. Before we depart tomorrow, however, Ed needs a new tube, and my bike needs to stop chirping like a nest of newborn robins. I guess it's only fitting that the last 100 miles be particularly sweaty.

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Schwitzing on the radio. Good thing it wasn't tv.

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My name is hot dog, and I'd like you to meet my friend, boiled p-nutz

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Key Largo, FL

A late start, coupled with some rain, delayed our departure to the keys.wending through Miami was not for the feignt of heart, but we eventually found ourselves on Old Cutler road, which delivered ourselves from the land of Jiggy while offering tasteful views of some lower Miami communities. We were especially impressed with Coconut Grove where the Crawl for Cancer was in full effect.
After a few more towns begins an 18 mile stretch of marshy hell that leads to the keys. One lane each way, with a shoulder drawn my a three year old and then puked on by every cement truck in America. A sign counts the number of fatalities thus far this year on the highway (5), which warms the soul.

But then, just when things could not be any crappier, joy came in the form of a hotdog stand run by two very cool and gracious women who supplied us with water and peanuts cooked with their own special recipe. We wish them well and want to say thanks again. .

We finally rolled into Key Largo, Charles' back tire in utter disrepair. The worst part is over. Key West, here we come.